Friday, September 28, 2012

Joys of travelling

After a totally groovy and beautifully relaxing - as relaxing as it can be while you're writing your MA thesis - month travelling around London's backwaters on a boat, I started missing nomadic life again. Travelling from place to place, discovering and observing the curious behavior of resident natives, meeting people, drawing and listening to new music. Boat life brought on a wave of mixed feelings toward my already uncertain future, but these were cast aside to enjoy the present. I found myself singing again like I haven't since I was a child, and felt like writing again. All because I was on the move once more. I decided the life for me must be the life of a traveler.

Sure the toilet and shower situation was not ideal, but I quickly discovered ways around this. A flicker of doubt stirred when I was confronted by an enormous mound of possessions I had left at a friend's house, but these were resolved by purchasing a cheap transportable suitcase. It was annoying having to transport my life on foot the weekend that London decided it had had enough of summer and opened up the heavens to welcome torrential rains. It also wasn't terribly comfortable sleeping on friend's floors and couches, but wasn't until a the mother of all dilemmas that I finally remembered: I hate travelling. I had missed my flight.

The two hours prior to a flight are the most intensely stressful regardless of whether you make the flight or not. This is particularly the case if you have fallen out of touch with stress of flying. Neverthelless, everything happens for a reason and I have emerged if just a tiny bit wiser.

Things I learned in the process:

  • It is VERY important to check your flight details a day in advance.
  • You can pay for as many bags as you like on an easyjet flight, but the sum weight of all bags must not go over 20kg (21kg if you're extra simpática).
  • If you have excess baggage it is cheaper  to get it shipped rather than paying the airline for the administrative manpower to process said baggage. These admin positions must be the best paid jobs ever. Furthermore, all airports have such shipping areas, you just have to ask for them. 
  • Old ladies at check-in desks will say and agree to virtually anything to get over-inquisitive young whippersnappers away from their counters. "Can I get a refund for my unused baggage allowance?" "Of course!" "Can I get it after the flight?" "Most definitely!" Do I have to do this online?" "Yup!" "Is your website the most deceiving, uninformative, useless website ever?" "Uhu!" thanks. Harassed men at ticket sales desks are much more honest.
  • The security metal detectors select people at random regardless of the amount of metal or sharp objects they have on them. You might as well wear whatever you want.
  • Lady Gaga's first scent smells exactly like Britney's.

Things I already knew:
  • Airport food is ridiculously overpriced and bland
  • WHSmith books are ridiculously overpriced
  • Perfumes are ridiculously overpriced
  • Airport travel is the most annoying and stressful activity ever, yet this is the preferred medium of travel?!
  • Departure screens are shameless liars.

So the decision I came to after all of these important life lessons? I am going to buy a boat.